Quora: If you are an adoptive parent, do you celebrate your child's 'gotcha day'?

My answer, originally published on Quora.

Q: If you are an adoptive parent, do you celebrate your child's 'gotcha day'or 'homecoming day'?

If yes, how do you do it?

My Answer:

We don't. The main reason is that, for both of my kids, this day would either be really close to the birthday or to Christmas.

But the other reason is that my husband and I feel the term "gotcha" has negative connotations -- to me it brings up imagery of "snatching" a child. The other inappropriate connotation is when you play a prank on someone and then say "gotcha!" Neither of these sentiments is something we want associated with adoption.

I know of some families that consider the "Gotcha" day to be more important than the child's birthday, ostensibly because that's the day the child joined the family. I don't get that. The me, it seems obvious that being born is more important than being adopted.

Like the friend of Dennis Rogan, I've spoken at my kids' schools about adoption, but I tie it to National Adoption Month (November) rather than "gotcha" day.

Sue Raisty

Product management geek, born-again engineer, adoptive mother of boys, coach & mentor, mountain trail runner, tinkerer, no-bull communicator, wannabe writer, room mother & compulsive researcher.

Silicon Valley, California http://blog.sueraisty.com